Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
