shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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