So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
