I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
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I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
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Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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