when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
