So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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