If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
