I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
now i know why i became what i already was.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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