im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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