we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got carded by a ten year old.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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