I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize