woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.