could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize