Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
