I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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