I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
