party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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