ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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