Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize