I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
