it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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