he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
