I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
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