You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
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