i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
