That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I'm just crazy horny about you
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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