So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Randomize
