Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
