Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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