Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
