Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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