C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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