They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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