You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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