some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I intend to get homeless drunk
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
