help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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