Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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