peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Im part way to drunk.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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