Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Randomize
