Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
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Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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