your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car