eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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