Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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