are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
