i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
