I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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