He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
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She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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