If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
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