All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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