he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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